As a coach, whether I’m working with students in my Styling Academy or clients in my Cleopatra coaching programme, I always start with the same question:
What do you actually want?
It sounds simple, but many people can’t answer it with real clarity. Do you want to lose weight? Build a business? Feel more confident? Change careers? Find a relationship? Before we can create change, we have to make the goal obvious.
Recently, I re-read Atomic Habits by James Clear, and one message stood out more than ever: it’s not your goals that determine your success — it’s your systems.
Most people think they need more motivation.
They don’t.
They need a better system.
I’ve seen people create vision boards, save inspirational quotes and visualise the life they want. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with that. In fact, I encourage my clients to think about how they want to feel when they achieve their goal. That’s what makes it attractive. It’s exciting. It’s inspiring. It gives you a reason to keep going.
But visualisation alone won’t change your life. A system will.
When I’m coaching someone, we don’t stop at, “I want to lose weight.”
We ask much better questions:
When will you exercise?
What time?
Before or after breakfast?
What will you wear?
What happens if it rains?
The smaller the detail, the greater the chance of success.
James Clear talks about four simple principles that can be applied to almost any habit:
- Make it obvious.
- Make it attractive.
- Make it easy.
- Make it satisfying.
They’re so simple, but incredibly powerful.
Take someone who wants to get healthier.
Making it obvious might mean planning meals for the week or leaving your trainers by the front door.
Making it attractive could be imagining how confident you’ll feel walking into that holiday, wedding or important event knowing you feel fantastic.
Making it easy means removing unnecessary decisions. Lay out your gym clothes the night before. Book the class in advance. Decide exactly when you’re going—not “sometime tomorrow.”
Making it satisfying means recognising every small win, because those tiny actions compound into extraordinary results.
I’ve learned this lesson myself.
When I was building my styling business, I had the vision. I could picture the life I wanted. I imagined working with clients, running my own business and creating a career on my own terms.
But nothing really changed until I built a system.
I started getting up at 5 a.m. Not because it sounded impressive, but because it gave me dedicated time to meditate, exercise, learn and work on my business before the rest of the day took over.
That routine wasn’t glamorous but it was repeatable. And that’s what changed everything.
If there’s one thing I’d love you to take away, it’s this:
Don’t ask yourself, “How motivated am I?”
Ask yourself, “What system have I put in place to make success inevitable?”
Because motivation comes and goes. A well-designed system is what keeps moving you forward long after the excitement has faded.
Love Nisha x